Grief in the workplace: why conversations matter more than assumptions

When someone is navigating grief, colleagues and leaders often want to do the right thing. But without real communication, it’s easy for assumptions to take over.

Maybe we assume they’d prefer not to be disturbed.
Maybe we assume they don’t want to be included in certain activities.
Maybe we assume they’ll speak up if they need help.

All well-intentioned. But sometimes, those assumptions can leave someone feeling more isolated rather than supported.

Why this is so important at work

When assumptions replace conversations, two risks emerge:
People may be unintentionally excluded from opportunities or moments they actually want to be part of.

They may miss out on the specific kind of support they really need.

And for those grieving, voicing needs can feel overwhelming when so much else already feels heavy. That’s why creating space for open dialogue is so important.

What leaders can do

• Check in gently: “How would you like me to support you right now?”
• Offer options: “Would you like to be included in this, or prefer to skip it?”
• Accept that answers may change over time.

What those grieving can do

It’s okay to express your needs - even if they shift.
It’s okay to say:
“I’d like to be included.”
“Today I need space.”
“I don’t know right now, but I’ll let you know when I do.”

This is what we need to remember

Support isn’t about perfect answers. It’s about creating space for honest conversations and being willing to listen.

That’s what makes the difference.