Grief in the workplace: why anniversaries matter

In the last fortnight, I’ve faced three pretty big dates back-to-back.

Our wedding anniversary.

The anniversary of losing my husband.

Father’s Day.

For me, these two weeks are always heavy. They bring both love and loss, joy and sadness. And this year, like every year, they’ve also brought an emotional exhaustion that is hard to describe.

At work, anniversaries often go unnoticed. They’re not dates in a company calendar. But for those grieving, they can be some of the hardest days of the year.

Why it matters at work

Grief doesn’t stay at home when we log on. It comes with us... into meetings, emails, and projects.

And on anniversaries, that grief is amplified. The emotional load is heavier, energy is harder to find, and the mental space needed to “perform” at work feels stretched thin.

What leaders can do

You don’t need a policy to support someone through anniversaries. What you need is awareness, compassion, and flexibility.

Practical ways to support include:

1. Know the dates. If someone has shared them with you, put them in your calendar.

2. Check in. A simple “I’m thinking of you today” can mean more than you realise.

3. Offer flexibility. Allow someone to take the day off, work from home, or lighten their workload.

4. Respect boundaries. Some people may want to talk, others may not. Let them lead the way.

5. Normalise it. Make it clear that anniversaries are part of grief, and that it’s okay to acknowledge them at work.

It really makes a difference 

Grief anniversaries are reminders of the love someone has lost, and the life they’re learning to live without.

For me, navigating them takes planning, energy, and support. And when workplaces recognise that, it helps lighten the load and I couldn't thank my workplace enough for being supportive during this time. 

The truth is, anniversaries will always be part of my year. And when leaders offer a little bit of support, it creates space for people like me to keep showing up, both as humans and as professionals.

How has your workplace acknowledged (or not acknowledged) anniversaries of grief? What difference did it make?